Settling In (Jenna McAbee)

Have you ever established a home away from home? When you walk into your friend’s house and it feels as if you too live there? You can freely get food from the cupboard and use the bathroom with ease. You are close to the siblings and aren’t afraid of arguing with your friend in front of their parents. You go visit the parents even when your friend is not there. That is the same kind of home away from home, being comfortable somewhere else, I have quickly established here in York, England. Already I am settling in and fully immersing myself in the English culture, customs, and society.

To be honest, I did not expect to love York this much. It was somewhat of a last-minute decision even to apply to this program. To say I was uneasy about spending an entire semester across the pond (the Atlantic Ocean) was an understatement. I was terrified. One of the main forces acting to put me at ease was my three-week spring break, during which my parents would both come visit me. But other than that, I agonized about not being able to call my parents at every inconvenience, at every joy, at every time of homesickness. Every time I told someone I was going to study abroad in England, they replied, “Oh, you are going to love London!”, as if London were the only city in England. I was quick to disclose that I was actually studying in York, a city about two hours north of London. They looked at me quizzically, as if doubting my decision. After an awkward pause: “Well, you will love it there too!”, as if they had even heard of York. I myself began to question my decision to come here…maybe I should have gone to London, I thought.

Those thoughts quickly dissipated when I got off the bus at our housing accommodations on January 24. I was immediately charmed by the brick buildings, the stunning contrast between the brick and the feathery clouds in the blue sky, and the crisp green grass between the flats. My room, initially bare, soon became a little haven for me as I decorated the walls with pictures from home and posters purchased at the outdoor market. I was fortunate enough to have Liz, a girl whom I sort of already knew, as one of my four flat-mates. God has truly been looking out for me in this entire experience, making this semester so joyful and full of new friendships.

But the main element in making my transition so seamless and swift has been the city of York itself. It is full of ancient and modern charm, kind people, and quaint restaurants. My friends and I have made it a habit to walk into town at least three times a week –each time I am captivated by the darling, locally-owned shops, the cobblestone streets, and the number of elderly people walking hand in hand through the city center (as the British call downtown). The street vendors are a pleasure to chat with, and I always find myself snapping pictures of the vibrant flowers and lush green plants for sale. And the people here are so genuinely kind! They constantly look out for others.

One day, my friends and I were waiting on the corner in the city center for our Uber to pick us up. Twice, a pair of elderly ladies approached us, asking if we were lost and needed help with directions. They were swift to provide us with information about the taxi services in York, where they picked up passengers from, and the number to call if we needed one. We ended up chatting with the first pair of ladies for about ten minutes. Maybe we reminded them of their grandkids, or maybe we just seemed to be really lost and in need of rescuing. Either way, these complete strangers went out of their way to be of service to us when they could just as easily have strolled by. Would that have happened in America…?

Lastly, York St John University has been especially welcoming to us as international students. I have met so many friendly Brits in my classes at YSJ, and they are always fascinated with my American accent.They are quick to argue that they don’t have accents; we do. It’s all about perspective, right? The old brick buildings on campus are GORGEOUS, too –they’re similar to our flats, but the brick has a more weathered look, and the magnificence of the buildings never fails to make me pause and stare.

A couple of my friends and I joined the university’s volleyball team, and we were immediately accepted into their volleyball family. The players make me feel welcome and wanted and appreciated, and it feels exhilarating to be a part of a team. When I first arrived at volleyball practice, I was undeniably nervous. “What if I am the worst one on the team or they leave me out?” I fretted. I observed them all warming up, and suddenly remembered that I had not played in over a year. Then I freaked out even more. I glanced timidly around the court and made eye contact (thankfully) with a friendly looking student who smiled and bounded over. She introduced herself as the captain of the women’s team and quickly invited me to join it. Within a few minutes, she had introduced me to all the other players, and I was soon known as the American. Now I gleefully attend practice twice a week and have formed a tight bond with several of my teammates. Some have even talked about coming to visit me in the US!

I never could have imagined settling into a new school, in an entirely different country, so soon. I am happy to call York my home away from home, and I have really settled in.